Turtles All the Way Down

A Vacation Best-Of Series

Hi Friends! I’m away from my desk during July, and I want to stay in touch with you. So for the next few Fridays you’ll be getting some essays that I posted previously at another site. I’ve also included an audio version if you prefer to listen. Happy Summer to you all, and I’ll see you in August with new posts.

Turtles All the Way Down

Aza wrestles with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. For her, the world is a teeming mass of predatory germs. Not just in the surrounding environment. Not just on her skin. Germs have insinuated themselves into the dark recesses of her body, lurking deep within her intestinal tract slowly but surely infecting her with c diff (clostridium difficile colitis).

Photo by Marcel Strauß on Unsplash

Eating a peanut butter sandwich in her high school lunchroom can trigger a vortex of what she calls invasive thoughts. Her psychiatrist’s term for them is actually “intrusives,” but Aza experiences them as invasive. Thoughts, one after another, arguing back and forth, swi…